Partidge Family Redux (cum on, get happy)

Dearest reader, I apologize in advance for The World's Stupidest Post, but sometimes, I simply can neither contain nor control myself. And, incidentally, I think I love you.


Sung to the tune of the Partridge Family's "I Think I Love You"

Bah, bah bah ba ba ba ba bah bah
Bah ba ba ba baaaah.

I'm sleeping
and right in the middle of a wet dream
like all at once I wake up
from something that has made me want to cream.
Before I bust my seam
I hold my pillow to my head
and spring up in my bed
screaming out the words I dread:
I think I fucked you. I think I fucked you

This morning, I woke up with this hard-on
I didn't know how to deal with.
And so I just decided to myself
I'd pump it off myself.
And never talk about it.
And didn't I go and spout it
when you walked into my room.
I think I fucked you. I think I fucked you

I think I fucked you!
So what am I so afraid of?
I'm afraid I have contracted
a disease there is no cure for.

I think I fucked you.
Isn't that what sex is made of?
Though it worries me to say
I never came this way.

(Insert Laurie's purposeful and heartfelt harpsichord solo, during which she looks so pretty performing, here.)

I don't what I'm up against.
I don't know what it's all about.
I've got so much to think about.

Hey!

I think I fucked you!
So what am I so afraid of?
I'm afraid I have contracted
a disease there is no cure for.

I think I fucked you.
Isn't that what sex is made of?
Though it worries me to say
I never came this way.

Believe me,
you really don't have to fuck me.
I only want to make you climax.
And if you say,
"hey, fuck yourself," I will.
But I think better still
I'd better stay around and fuck you.
Do you think I have a chance?
Can I get into your pants?

Do you think you fucked me?

I think I fucked you!

I think I fucked you!

I think I fucked you!

I think I fucked you!

I think I fucked you!

I think I fucked you!